So I recently audition for the the Milwaukee Symphony Orchestra, Assistant Oboe position. I generally get all mysterious and don't like to talk about my audition process or preparation or results with people because I am insecure and doubt myself. That being said I am trying to move past those negative feelings to be able to share them with the world. Maybe they will help someone, maybe being more open and less insecure will help me too!

Now we are at the MSO audition that just happened. I was prepared. The list of excerpts was reasonable with measure numbers (phew! I hate when they don't list the exact requirements and scare you into thinking you have to play the whole symphony!) I felt great about some and ok about others. I had a reed that I loved, but nervous since my backups were iffy. Then it comes time to actually audition and classic Stepher I miss my high D :( on the Barber excerpt. This mistake kills me because it is mostly in my head. I have taught myself over time to be terrified of slurring up to a high D because I always grunt it out and miss the entrance. This being said. I actually don't miss the high D anymore, I USED to miss the high D, but that fear has been so entrenched in my playing that my fears like to come true.
So my convoluted diary entry about auditions is really about this: Don't worry about missing notes ahead of time. What does that do!!!?? Nothing! Just expect to play the notes they way you are planning to play them. Expect to play the music the way you prepared it. Then most likely you WILL play the music the way you expect. I miss that note because I EXPECTED TO MISS IT!! STOP IT! ok enough yelling at myself.
Moral of my story: expect greatness from yourself and you will get greatness. Expect to mess up stupid little mistakes and you will find yourself messing up stupid little mistake cause you are thinking about them instead of the great things.
Thank you for reading another set of ramblings from www.StepherEng.com Enjoy your day
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